How's Your Couple Hygiene?

Caring for Your Relationship: The Importance of Regular Tune-Ups

Did you know that nearly 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the U.S. end up getting divorced? Many couples start their journey together with the best intentions but often lack the tools and knowledge to nurture their relationship over time. In fact, a survey by Nicole Weaver found that about 50 percent of those who have divorced later regret their decision, with many contemplating giving their relationship another chance.

It’s a common scenario: couples seek therapy only when things feel dire rather than using it as a proactive measure—much like how we care for our teeth. We all know the importance of regular dental check-ups and daily oral hygiene. Just as you brush and floss to maintain a healthy smile, taking care of your relationship requires consistent effort and attention.

Think of your relationship as a system. When one part struggles, the entire system can feel the effects, much like how dental issues can spread if left untreated. If you sense something is off, don’t wait for it to worsen—seeking help from a therapist can help you get back on track. And just like brushing your teeth, regular “couples hygiene” can help keep your relationship strong.

Building Healthy Relationship Habits

Good couples hygiene starts with both partners taking care of themselves. This includes establishing routines that foster individual well-being—think self-awareness, exercise, and engaging in activities that bring you joy. By focusing on your own health, you set a solid foundation for a thriving relationship.

Now, let’s talk about the “we” aspect of your partnership. Engaging in shared activities can be incredibly beneficial. This might involve practicing conscious communication, participating in fun exercises together, and nurturing a rich emotional and physical connection. After all, a strong relationship is built on joy and intimacy.

Relationships evolve, just like individuals. Just as you might schedule a dental check-up every six months, it’s valuable to periodically evaluate how your relationship is growing. Consider the three vital components of your relationship: you, me, and we. How are you both taking care of yourselves, and how are you nurturing your connection?

The Four T’s of Relationship Care

To help assess your relationship’s health, I like to focus on what I call the Four T’s: Time, Talk, Touch, and Trust. These elements are essential in evaluating and improving your couples hygiene. Each partner can work on enhancing these areas, and I provide clients with tangible skills to strengthen their bond.

It’s also beneficial to consult a skilled couples therapist from time to time, just like you would for dental cleanings. Unfortunately, many couples only seek help when they’re in distress, much like coming in for a root canal. While that process can be uncomfortable, addressing the root of your issues is crucial for healing.

Hope for Every Couple

At Recovery Help Now, Inc., we believe in the power of conscious connection within relationships. Your primary partnership can be a safe haven for emotional growth and healing. It’s inspiring to witness couples committing to creating a secure space for each other while still finding joy and adventure together.

Remember, it is entirely possible to reignite the spark in your relationship. We want to instill hope in every couple facing challenges. With the right tools and support, you can cultivate a thriving, resilient partnership. Let’s take this journey together!

By Elana Clark-Faler, LCSW, CST, CSAT, SEP