17 Jul A Guide to Co-Commitment by Anna McClelland, LMFT
Clients are often confused about the difference between healthy dependence and independence in relationships vs co-dependence. Developing skills to balance independence and dependence is difficult especially if one is unclear about what healthy attachments look like. When clients are starting to learn new ways of navigating closeness and distance in their relationships, I often recommend “Conscious Loving: A Guide to Co-Commitment” by Gay and Kathlyn Hendricks. I assign it to both my individual and couples clients. This book does a great job of distinguishing the difference between co-dependent relationships (entanglements) and healthy co-committed relationships. The Hendricks discuss the difference between these two concepts and make complicated topics such as how the unconscious impacts the way we are in the world, how the past impacts our current relationships and the projection process easy to understand. I love this book because the Hendricks are able to inspire and challenge readers to take responsibility for their own part in relationships and they provide tons of skills/tools for recognizing and changing destructive thoughts and behaviors.