26 Jun Don’t Get Fooled…Listening to Your Intuition by Anna McClelland, LMFT
When I practiced Zen, the Sensei I studied with would talk about how we already “are” what we think we need to “get” or “be” or “change”. That happiness, discipline or whatever it is we feel we lack, already exists in us and it’s just a matter of acknowledging “it”, dusting “it” off and deciding to be “it”. This conceptualization resonates with me and, for some reason, comforts me. It’s like, the journey of uncovering these parts of myself is waaayyy less scary and exhausting than having to find it outside of myself and then integrate it into my life.
Everything we need we already have… we “know” everything. Jack Kornfield gave a talk that included this idea at a psychology conference I went to many years ago. He basically said to look to yourself for the right answers because YOU KNOW. YOU KNOW and you know what, you know, YOU KNOW’. And, damn it, he’s right! We do know! We “know” what makes us happy, we “know” how to make stuff happen, we “know” when our relationship is in trouble, we “know” when it’s time to change jobs, we “know” when someone is lying to us. Knowingness is intuition and if we tap into our “knowingness” we can make decisions that help us uncover all the great things we think we want to be, but already are and choose to ignore.
Unfortunately, we aren’t always listening to our intuition. We are busy hoping our intuition isn’t right because that might mean we have to make hard decisions. We might make someone mad, have to give something up, leave someone we are attached to and we might have to get help or take a stand. We might have to acknowledge our past mistakes or our angry feelings. Whatever defenses we have acquired to stand in the way of getting in touch with our knowingness, we can always work through or let go of. We can do that by finding a non-judgmental space to look at ourselves. Kick shame to the curb, meditate to reduce anxiety and gain clarity. And please, seek professional help, by a licensed therapist, for support and guidance if you think you have been engaged in an unhealthy relationship that has prevented you from being able to connect with your intuition.